So...anyone that knows me well, realizes how awesome I am. However, sadly enough, those poor souls whom have not had the good fortune to get to know me beyond the occasional transaction, may be lacking the insight into my true being. A gaze into the stained-glass window that is my life, showing my inner most frailties...and how God hates me...
It is well documented. God has never really liked me. Just a few examples from my storied youth:
- The time during High School baseball when I lost the game single handedly by throwing the ball away like a moron (I was always a much better hitter than a fielder)
- I started working at the Thompson Country Club Golf Course in the fifth grade & managed to save enough money to buy my first car all on my own when I got my license...& then totalled it later that year...
- I once qualified for the finals of the Massachusetts Junior Amateur Golf Championship...& then promtly shot a crowd pleasing 103 to take myself right out of it in the first round...
- Somehow putting the thought in my head that I shouldn't dump Jen so I could have my shot with Jane Metzinger...
- Worse yet...making me date Jen for 3+ years in the first place...& never letting me get past first base
- Having Gloria Mayfield actually call home to ask why I wanted out of chorus (I had forged a letter from my mother to get myself out of it)
- Or the time when I got my finger stuck in the grocery market conveyer belt (yeah....it hurt)
- Every year, my "loving" wife leaves me, right around the time of my birthday, for 2 weeks to volunteer at a place where at least one of their un-paid volunteers cry every year...and can never understand why it bothers me to practically not see her for two weeks, as I come home every day from my miserable job to an empty house & another night of loneliness while she is off having fun in the city...
- How he let's me have these great rounds of golf...when nobody's with me...I always play great when I am all alone on the golf course...(notice the "alone" theme)
- We finally get a home equity loan in order to build an addition to the house (which we thought would be the hard part), but then we couldn't find a 10x10 room for less than $70,000
- I finally picked up my new Titleist driver after 3+ weeks of waiting for the specially ordered shaft (when they told me it would take one), & they put the wrong shaft in it...
Sometimes God throws you a little bone here & there. The latest example being
ng the other day, when I was attempting to put my new soft top onto my Wrangler. I was in a race against time to get the new top on before it started to rain. He did throw a few hurdles my way...first the dealership gave me the wrong screws for the brackets. Upon going back to the dealership, they only had two of the correct ones. So I took those to just get the top going. Now off to Sears to buy the #40 Torx head bit needed to install the screws. Got it. Now to work...Then the #40 Torx head bit that the manual said to use didn't fit. I then went back to Sears to buy a new (& correct) #30 Torx head, brought it home...& the bit didn't fit my wratchet. You guessed it...back to Sears to buy a wratchet to fit the bit.After all of this, I finally managed to get the top on just as the first sprinkles were beginning to fall...
So that got me thinking...maybe things are looking up!?! Not only did the top that I had just installed only cost me $200 (retails @ $1500+), but God didn't smite me on this day as has been tradition. This is awesome...maybe I'm off of the universe's black-list. That would be awesome!
My life is pretty awesome! I have good friends, a decent job, a decent golf game, my kitchen is finally being renovated (taking out that damn wall between the two rooms), & I'm pretty damn good-looking to boot!
Plus...here's the mini-cherry, on top of the regular cherry, on top of the sundae of awesomeness that is my life...I get to go home every day to this...
Sometimes it takes something as simple as the rain holding off for a few minutes to make you remember how awesome your life is...
1 comment:
Well, you don't come home to that exact picture. That was taken 10 years and 40 pounds ago. Also we don't still have blow up plastic furniture in our living room.
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